Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Better

MILES

Fank you all for your concern about my my-grane. After a long nap in a dark room wif an ice pack on my head (I taked all of your suggestshuns into account) I hollered at mommy for some HAM. I got TURKEY. humpf. Now, turkey is good, but it's not ham. I tried to 'splain this, and while I was still 'splaining this, she TAKED MY DISH OF TURKEY AWAY. She saidded that if I didn't want the turkey, she would put it away. Now, I didn't akshually SAY I didn't want it, I was just 'splaining that ham was better. So, while she was making her "sit around and watch your weight" pizza for dinner, I standed up on my back legs and stretched out my claws on my front paws and POKED HER IN THE HINEY. TWICE. She hollered at me and I hollered back at her and tolded her I was getting anofurr my-grane from all the hollering, so she gifed me back my turkey. sheesh. Later, while she was eating her strawberries with somefing white on them, I gotted up on the couch and sniffed around at it. Then I stuck my tongue out and lickded the white stuff while she was trying to eat it. I tolded her that it was not real dairy produkt and she should not be eating it, but she saided that it's sugar free somefing or other. it tasted like ick. she saved some for me but I didn't eat it. So she saided "Miles, are you feeling ok? you're not eating your sugar free non-dairy frozen whipped topping from a white container". Right, Like I would eat somefing like that. what does she fink I am? a garbage can?

22 comments:

William said...

Miles, sometimes you just have to put your paw down (or I guess up, in your case--ha ha ha!) when moms start this business of removing our food. AND, you should get real whipped cream from cows, not containers. That's the law.

Derby said...

Our bodies are temples, we must not eat partially dehydrogenated anything. Or wheat gluten.

Artsy Catsy said...

I think it must be bad bean week, Miles. Mine won't give me my dry kibble anymore and she went out today and got a harness she tried to strap me in! She says I can go outside all the time if I wear it, but I say I'M the boss of everything and the CEO and you don't tie me up in a strap! It was too tight, anyway. I think I'm getting a migraine, too!

Rocky

Max said...

Oh man, you make me wish I had claws just so I could poke the Woman on the butt like that! I think you get 3 or 4 style points for that...

Karen Jo said...

You sure know how to get your Mom's attention, Miles. I'm glad you got your turkey back. I don't blame you for not eating the white stuff.

DaisyMae Maus said...

Oh, Miles ... Your day has just sucked, hasn't it? No ham. Disappearing turkey. Migraines. And then phony-baloney whip? No ... It must not stand! I highly suggest a mutiny. She might not think you're a garbage can, but she was actin' like she thought you were a stupid woofie (no offense to the SMART woofies)!
DMM

Tara said...

hehehehe...Mom's lafin at you Miles! But I agree about the white stuff, sounds awful....

I saw a HOG today! Thats what Mom called it, but I don't think you can eat it, it had two wheels, and fire breathing on its tail.

Tara

Dragonheart said...

Oh Miles, I'm sorry that you didn't get any ham, but turkey is yummy too!

That white stuff sounds weird. My mom studied nutrition at university, so she doesn't like to eat any of that fake stuff.

I hope you get some ham soon!

DEBRA said...

Miles

Yu had me laffin and laffin (like Jeter says) ofur stickin yur Mommie in da rear, not once but twice. Now that is a sure fire way to get her attenshunz. We agrees wif yu ham is better dan turkee. But I still like my dried Fancy Feast the furry best-- or temtatshunz! Miles we hopes yur Mommie will find sum hams furr yu today.

Bye Miles!
::::wavin paws:::
Boo, Jinx, Gracie and Ping

Bye to my sweet gorgeous midnite meezer mancat Sammys!

Purrs and Nosekisses
Your adoring angel baby
Abby

Kukka-Maria said...

The solution is simple: Hire a human JUST TO GIVE YOU FOOD. Sounds like your mom is a little selfish and preoccupied with her OWN needs to realize that Turkey is NOT ham and sugar-free whipped topping is NOT good.

I could help you interview servants...

jeter harris said...

matzo givez me my-granez.
duhr.
we had da reel white stuff heer. mmmmm ... yum! an it'z fattenin, too!
luv--jh

Prinnie and Caesar said...

you were very smart to turn your nose up to the things that you do not desire to eat. (I do like terkee)
That whippy stuff is full of kemicles and it smells horrid!

I hope you headache stays away!!

~Prinnie

Parker said...

Hee-Hee, you poked her in the behind TWICE! Good one! Maybe that will get you some HAM soon. I feel your pain - Mommy is on a diet and nothing she eats tastes very good to me!

Name: Mr. Hendrix said...

oh Miles, you had a rough one. I can't believe she took your turkey away! I can't believe you didn't get ham! At least you got some turkey in the end.
That white stuff doesn't sounds appealing at all. Nasty. Take care of that my-grane buddy.

Big Piney Woods Cats said...

Momma puts this white stuff in her coffee she calls flavored creamer that will last at least a gazillion years. Now, I ask you, what kind of milk product lasts that long? This is scary stuff.

Patches

Renee said...

Darly likes turkey...lots. And we went to a place called Quiznos where they make turkey sandwiches that we really like. So I ordered Darly's turkey sandwich and they gave her a HAM sandwich! Darly was not happy...I had to take the ham out of her sandwich and switch it with the turkey from mine (dont' know how the ding dong got mine right and hers wrong!) so she at that turkey while I had the ham. We should have said something, but I didn't mind the ham.
Now about that sugar free white stuff...blech! You know eating real sugar is better for you than eating that fake sugar stuff...right?

Cheysuli said...

I can't believe your human tried to pass off turkey as ham.. and you when you were just getting over being sick too!

Daisy said...

Hmmm, turkey is not as good as ham. But some turkey is better than no turkey. I am with you on the white stuff, yeck.

I am going to try the poking thing on my Mommie; seems like it worked for you.

George, Tipper, Max & Misty said...

Miles, this is clearly a case of "failure to communicate". Not on your part of course, but sometimes it's hard to get through to humans. You just have to keep trying until you get what you want!

Junior said...

I am glad your migraine is gone. That is purrty funny about you poking your Mom in the hiney...twice! I bet she wasn't laffin though. That will teach her to take away your food.

Kaze, Latte, or Chase said...

Sounds like you handled the situation well. That white stuff sounds HORRIBLE. Ick. Good job yelling at your mom and poking her butt.

Latte

Hot(M)BC said...

Sometimes Mommies can be so stubborn. Yoo did good gettin her attenshun, tho Miles. I's purroud of yoo.
PURRRRRRRRRRRRS n nosekisses,
yore girlfriendcat Sanjee

Meezer Monday

MILES Yeah, it's Meezer Monday.  EVERY MONDAY IS MEEZER MONDAY and that woman just does not care.  She doesn't feed me good food...