Thursday, May 31, 2007

AAAACCCKKKKKK

MILES

OH MY GOSH!!! I hadded to go to the v-e-t. Just 'acause I keeps falling ofurr doesn't mean there's somefing wrong wif me!!!

Well, ferst, I gotted the burrito wrap and gotted taken out the door to the metal monster wif wheels. When we pulled into the parking lot at the v-e-t I got furry upset and started panting. We wented inside and I dug my claws into mommys neck (sorry mommy). This is the place where they ripped my teefs out of my head!!!

We sitted in the waiting room and all of the nurses and assistants came ofurr to me and tolded me that I was the most beautiful kitty they had efurr seen! Well, that's prolly true.

Then we wented into the torchur room. There was a cute girl there that was going to take me to get weighed, but ferst, I peed on mommy. (Sorry mommy). So I hadded to get my butt washed when I gotted weighed.

Then the v-e-t came in. It was not the same v-e-t that ripped my teefs out of my head, so that was good. But I was furry furry stressed and kepted panting. She lookded in my eyes and ears. And then she grabbed my legs and pulled on them (mom's note: she was moving them to see if he was in any pain). I kepted hissing at her but she called me a cutie and didn't believe I was a fierce mancat.

She wanted me to walk to see how my legs werked, but I refused. no way. uh-uh.

She saided that she has no idea what is wrong wif me. If I still has the same prollems on Monday, I has to go back. She gifed me some anti-in-flame-a-tories in case my legs is herting.

For good measure, I peed on mommy again while she was trying to pay.

When I gotted home, I started to run down the hall and falled down. Then mommy gifed me my medi-k-shuns and I jumpded down and falled down. Mommy is now going to chase me all ofurr the house wif the flashy fing to take videos to show the v-e-t.

I hopes that I stop falling ofurr soon. Going to the v-e-t is way too stressful for me.

v-e-t visit

SAMMY

Somefing is wrong wif Miles and he has to go to the v-e-t at 7:45 tonight. This morning he threw up his brekfest and since then he has been kind of falling down whenefurr he jumps up on anyfing or shakes his head or runs. Mommy is freaking out and crying and I am werried. Ofurr than the falling down when he jumps on somefing, he seems to be ok. He is purring and rolling around on the couch (once he gotted up there) and begging for food like normal. Please say a purrayer that the v-e-t says he's ok.

SAMMY
I like your new table clof. I also like to hear
"Sammy get off the table SAMMY GET OFF THE TABLE SAMMY GET OFF THE TABLE SAMMY GET DOWN NOW" shreiked at me over and over again.
I'm so cute.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Meezer Rule Wednesday


SAMMY


When the creatures that you allow to share your house wif you keep you up all night, hit them wif your death ray eyes.


For more Meezer Rule Wednesday, visit Cat Crossings











Tuesday, May 29, 2007

True Confesshuns

SAMMY

We gotted tagged by our good furriends Victor and Yao-lin for the True Confesshuns meme. We has to tell about our see-krets. Okay, well here is some:

1. Whapping is my favorite activity (oh that's not really a see-kret, is it?)
2. I eat mostly at night so that mommy can freak out and open multiple cans of food to get me to eat during the day. I likes the stinky goodness, but I likes making mommy crazy more.
3. I see aliens in the back yard that no one else can see. They freak me out and I must run in circles
4. Ok, i really don't see aliens in the backyard that no one else can see. I just like to run in circles to make mommy crazy.
5. I really do know that it's a table and not an elevated floor, but it's too funny to hear mommy say "Sammy get off the table" a squillion times in a row. And there is a rag rug on the table, so....... you figure it out.
6. I am the troublemaker / in-sta-gator of most fings that happen here. I just look cute and floofy so that no one 'spects that it's me.

MILES

1. I have to follow mommy all ofurr the house. If she is out of my sight, I get upset.
2. I doesn't cover my poops 'acause they is too stinky and I has to leave the litter box right away or I will die from the smell
3. I really am aggressive when I am in a lovey boy mood. I will grab mommy's face and put the bitey on her lips.
4. I am an attenshun hog. If someone comes to bisit, I haf to haf all the attenshun all the time.
5. I fink I want to be an UFC fighter when I grow up. I haf most of the moves down now.


Consider yourselfs ALL TAGGED.

Monday, May 28, 2007

Happy Memorial Day

O beautiful for heroes proved In liberating strife.
Who more than self their country loved
And mercy more than life!
America! America!
May God thy gold refine
Till all success be nobleness
And every gain divine!

Friday, May 25, 2007

He's HERE!!!

MILES

Daddy's here!! Daddy's here!!! BUT, I didn't see a pig come in wif him, or my foo-ton. He says that the foo-ton is bigger than his metal machine wif wheels, so I askded him why he didn't put wheels on the foo-ton and drive that up here so that I could sit on it. He saided that when we bisit him in June I can sit on it then. POOP.

Oh well, if that's the case, then there better be a pig coming tomorrow. I'm just sayin'.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

these is a few of my favorite fings

MILES

I was tagged by Precious Flower (one of my furry bestest furriends) to tell about my favorite fings.

TIME OF DAY: Well, while most of you would probably say "well Miles will say brekfest time, lunch time and dinner time" I would really haf to say Window Sill Kissy time wif Mommy. I love it when she leans ofurr and kisses my nose and then I stand up on my back legs and hold her face and lick it (sometimes I lick the inside of her nose and it freaks her out).

DAY OF THE WEEK: Any day is good.

SEASON: Well I like bar-be-que seasoning on my pork and chick-hen. What? OH, SEASON. Um, pig season. Whenefurr that is.

HOLIDAY: Um, any holiday that has the 4 basic food groups: ham, cow, chick-hen and turkey

BEACHES: I did some extensive research on this by watching the channel that tells about travelling all ofurr the werld. I fink that I would like any beach on the Cayman Islands.

SONG: Bubba Shot the Jukebox. Really. No, REALLY.

FLOWER: I'm not really into gardening. Mommy has some purrty 'lellow roses in the back garden that I likes to look at.

TALK SHOW: I doesn't like talk shows. I likes crime shows - like all the crime shows on that arts and entertainment stashun efurry morning.

MOVIE: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. OK, no not really. But it sounds more manly than Dirty Dancing. Chainsaws is manly, right? Alfough, Dirty Dancing is more fun.

SOAPS: Is CSI Miami a soap?

BEVERAGE: Rusty Nail. hahahahahaha. why would anyone drink somefing rusty? wouldn't the nails get stuck in your froat? i like water.

FRUIT: Um, is ham a fruit?

SNACK: tem-tay-shuns. And ham And shrimps. And crab. And soft boiled eggs wif crackers and milk all mixed togefurr. and baked beans.

FOOD: Any part of the pig is fine wif me. Except the snout. nope, I take that back, I like scrapple, and the label that mommy readed to me said "Ingredients: pig snouts, blah blah blah blah", so I guess the snouts is good too.

RESTAURANT: I'm wif Sammy on this one - Old Country Buffet, here we comes!!! I fink that I could easily eat Eleventy Eight ninety seven dollars werf of food.

I tag EFURRYONE!!



Tuesday, May 22, 2007

My Favorites

SAMMY



I haf been tagged by my furriend Chairman Mao and Precious Flower for a meme on my favorite fings.



TIME OF DAY: Whapping Time!! Usuhally between 3:08 am and 6-eleventeen am.



DAY OF THE WEEK: Efurry day!! There's ushually somefing good that happens efurry day



SEASON: I likes winter, 'acause in winter, the nasty ginger cat that torments me when I'm sitting in my window is not around. He must be in his house all winter - he lifs in the house 'ahind me, so I can see him real good when he comes outside.



HOLIDAY: I'm fond of groundhog day.



BEACHES: Um, mommy says they're places where there is sand, so I would haf to say the upstairs litterbox.



SONG: Stray Cat Strut of course



FLOWER: All flowers is tasty. OOPS, I mean purrty. But some taste better than ofurrs. Wait. I mean some LOOK purrtier than ofurrs. I doesn't know their names. Generally 'lellow flowers is the tastiest. Poo. I mean PURRITIEST.



TALK SHOW: We doesn't watch talk shows. (If I say Oprah, Kukka-Maria will come and beat the poop out of me)



MOVIE: We is not allowed to go out to the mofies. Alfough, I would take my beautiful girlfriend Abby to one if we was.



SOAPS: The Young and The Restless ('acause that's what Miles and I is) and The Bold and the Beautiful ('acuase again, that's what Miles and I is).



BEVERAGE: Martini, shaken not stirred. Ok, well I hafn't akshually hadded one 'acause I'm not efenn 3 yet.



FRUIT: Cant-elope



SNACK: TEM-TAY-SHUNS



FOOD: I really like crunchies more than stinky goodness. And I doesn't really like people food - 'cept shrimps and crab sometimes. and turkey once in a while. but only about 2 or 3 pieces. I LOVE LOVE LOVE whiskas crunchy food wif the soft centers like tem-tay-shuns, but mommy says that we has to eat mostly 'skripshun food for Miles' teefs. Purnia Dental Diet, 'skripshun strengf from the v-e-t.



RESTAURANT: We is not allowed to go out and eat, 'acause we does not know how to eat wif forks yet. But once we learn, we is heading out to an all you can eat buffet.



Since we has lots and lots of furriends and I cannot 'acide on who to tag, I tag EFURRYONE!

Friday, May 18, 2007

MILES

Fank you efurryone for your concern. I am ok - I was trying to climb the curtains and i begged for lunch food so mommy is not as concerned.

So, we was looking frough the pikshurs on mommy's 'puter to see what pikshur we would post today, and we finded pikshurs of our "cousins" - Buffy and Angel. They is mommy's parents 'poodins. They is bof boys - and no, they is not named after Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Buffy is Buffy 'acause his furs are a buff and white color. And Angel is Angel 'acause, well, 'parently, he can nefurr do anyfing wrong and he is Grampie's little Angel boy.

And fank you for your purrayers for Grampie. He is doing ok - he has to go back to the bean v-e-t next week for more pikshurs of his insides.




Thursday, May 17, 2007

Just stop

MILES

Just 'acuase I'm a little quiet since the pig rib stealing incident, and not poking my head into your dinner dish all the time (or lunch dish or brekfest dish), doesn't mean i'm sick or anyfing. I doesn't need to haf you poking around my mouf to see if my teefs hert and I scream. I haf not sleeped in the bed wif you for the last 2 nights 'acause you make too much noise and you flop all ofurr the place.
Howefurr, it has been fun making you open 7 different cans of stinky goodness today 'acause Sammy refuses to eat any of the new "organic" crap you bought.
But please JUST STOP poking me to see if i'm alright. You won't be all right if you keep it up lady.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

MOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM

SAMMY



Miles eated my foods again. I'm so hungry I can't move.
Ok, so no, not really. I'm just kind of bored and want to put the bitey on your toes.


UPDATE: Can efurrycat send out a little purrayer for our Grampie? (he's our mommy's Daddy). Mommy finded out this morning that he has new-monia. He is a geezer (81) and it's bad when geezers get new-monia. He needs a few purrayers. Fank you!

Update #2 I'm Kats Cat of the Day!!!





Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Miles Tuesday????

MILES

Well, since Sammy claimed Meezer Mancat Monday as his own, and I could not declare it Miles Monday, I hereby declare today Miles Tuesday.


Oh, and I stolded a whole pig rib last night from mommy's dinner plate. Yep, I didded. I put my mouf on the bone and pickded it up and ran off wif it. It was HEAVY. So I put it down and eated some of the pig meat. It was oink-a-lishus. Mommy was laffin' and laffin'. I eated a little too much fough, 'acause then I frew up about 3 minutes later. It could haf been all the stinky goodness i eated right 'afore I stolded the pig. I eated my dinner AND Sammy's dinner. I was hungry. Mommy wented away yesterday for werk and was gone all day. I was upset so I didn't eat all day. Yep. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Happy Mommy's Day

Happy Mommy's Day to our mommy and all the ofurr kitty mommy's in the cat blogsphere. We loves you all!!!

Friday, May 11, 2007

oh, you'll NEFURR guess what I gotted

MILES

Fank you all for the purrfday wishes - and for coming to share it wif me. We hadded LOTS of fun!!!!

I got THIS for my purrfday:




and then I gotted THIS (and oh yeah, there's a HAT that goes wif it too)




I'm goin' fishin!

SAMMY


Well, Miles is trying to find a fishing pole to go fishing in his new vest. So, I will answer the meme questions for him and me too - Mommy says we bof has to play. We gotted tagged by Ernesto and Mr Chen and Ollie and Caeser and Princess!!!

7 Random facts about us

1. I am scairt of the outside - really scairt. Alfough, I was NOT the one who peed on mommy the last time we wented in the metal machine wif wheels.

2. Alfough I appear to be furry laid back, I spend at least an hour a day running full speed frough the house yowling my head off

3. Miles is more of a momma's boy than me

4. Miles likes to chew on plastic stuff and that makes Mommy YELL

5. Whenefurr I see somefing that's not right out the back patio door, I start running around in circles and going 'ahind the curtain until Mommy looks out the door. She can NEFURR see what I see. It's a good fing I'm here, or aliens would haf stolen her a long time ago.

6 Miles is taller than me. And heavier. But I'm the big brofurr.

7. Mommy says we is bof "agressive" wif our loves - we shove our faces in hers and lick her cheeks or lips, and then we put the bitey on her lip.

We doesn't know if there is 7 out there who haf not been tagged, but we tag

1. My sweet angel baby Abby
2. Kukka - Miles' royal and lovely Empress
3. Sanjee - Miles' furry sweet girlfriend and Queen
4. Magoo, Bella, Dolce and Baci
5. Our bestest furriends
6. The Divine Miss Marilyn
7. The Meowers from Missouri

Thursday, May 10, 2007

IT'S MY PURRFDAY!!!!!

MILES

Today is my purrfday!! I'm 2!!!!! WOOOO -HOOOO

Efurrycat is invited ofurr to haf some tuna cake and HAM!!!!!! and NIP!!!!!


Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Whappage

SAMMY

Sometimes, she's not as stoopid as she looks!! The whappage was kepted to a minimum last night - I hadded a full bowl of crunchies 'afore bed time. Ok, so it was the icky 'skripshun dental kind that Miles has to eat (and doesn't), but I felted better and only whapped her in the head wif one remote control defise instead of two and a phone.

In ofurr news, Thursday is a speshul day for Miles. He is getting all 'acited.


Haf any poodins out there gotted anyfing for their mommies for mommy's day? we doesn't know what to get - i was finking of getting her some fev-ver toys. is that a good idea?

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

The whapping will commence at 3:08am

MILES

::SIGH:: MOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM i'm HUNGRY. We did not like the new organic New England Seafood Boil stinky goodness. Got anyfing else to eat? Might there be a pig in the frigerfrator? Or maybe a cow? I'm hungry enough to eat one of those (well, maybe not the hoofs).

OH, and I'm just gifing you fair warning - there is prolly not enuf crunchies in the bowl for Sammy, and you forgotted to get some more, so the whapping will prolly commense at about 3:08am. I hope it's not as ugly as last night. I fink you might haf grabbed Sammy in his hoo-ha area when you was trying to get him off the table. You haf to 'amember to keep your hands unner the covers and the whapping might not be so bad. I'm just trying to help you avoid it if possible. I unnerstand that Wegman's is open 24 hours. You might want to get in your metal machine wif wheels and get some more crunchies 'afore Sammy figures out that the bowl is only half full. Since he won't eat any stinky goodness 'cept the kind in the green cans, he's prolly pretty hungry.

Monday, May 07, 2007

SAMMY

An open letter to "Mommy"

Dear "Mommy"

You know I has a routine that I must stick to. If you doesn't play "fingers" wif me when you go down the stairs in the morning (or anytime really) I cannot eat brekfest. I gets so upset that I has to run back upstairs and yowl until you come up and ask me what's wrong. I has to hide unner the bed. Then I has to run around like my butt is on fire and yowl some more. By the time I am ready to eat brekfest, Miles has already eaten mine, so I has to yowl for more foods.

I has to haf crunchy food out at all times. If I runs out of crunchy foods in the middle of the night, I has to wake you up to tell you. How come you nefurr unnerstand me when I tell you I has no crunchy foods? Then I gets frustrated and has to whap you in the head wif stuff from the bedside table. I doesn't want to be bad, but I has to haf my crunchy foods.

If you is outside and the door is open, then I has to look out the door to make shur that no monsters eat you. There is monsters outside. I haf seed them when I was a baby and was losted outside. Just 'acause I looks out the door doesn't mean I wants to go out, or efenn wants to be near the door at the same time you is near the door. If you is near the door, that mean the door will open, and when the door opens, I get really stressed out and I haf to run and hide.

I fink most cats really haf efenn steps. I doesn't fink I look like I is marching when I is walking. Just 'acause Miles gallops and canters around the house like a horse doesn't mean I do it. It also doesn't mean I am obsessif compulsif or anyfing like that. And please stop laffing at me when I run - I'm not "double timing" my marching when I run. It doesn't mean anyfing that each of my steps is 'zaktly the same lengf all the time.

Now, about what you call my "front butt". That's just really mean "Mommy". I am not muscular like Miles. I am the soft, squishy floofy one. And I WEIGH LESS than Miles, and the v-e-t does not fink I am fat, so leaf it alone please. It herts my self esteem.

I hope that this helps you unnerstand me more "Mommy". Hopefully we will not haf anofurr ugly whapping incident tonight - please check the crunchy bowl 'afore bed.

Your loving floofy Sammy

Friday, May 04, 2007

Antique Pikshurs - part II

MILES



Well, you haf hearded of us talking about "The One Who Came Before" before. His name was Ralph, and he was borned July 31 1990 and wented to the Bridge on October 26 2002. He hadded stomach cancer. He was mommy's "sweet pea" and she still misses him. He looks like he was a nice kitty. Mommy says he was, but that he was a little "devil" too. HEY! He sounds like ME!!!!!


Thursday, May 03, 2007

Antique pikshurs

SAMMY


LOOKIE!!! Mommy finded this pikshur of baby Trixie (on the left) and baby Norton (on the right) taken in 1988 right after they was finded by Mommy and Daddy. We scanned it into the puter. Sorry if it's a little fuzzy, antique cameras must not haf taked good pikshurs waaaaaaaaaayy back then. Oh, sorry Mommy, i's not saying you're old or anyfing.

Since it has been 'zaktly 1 year since Norton ran off to The Bridge, we fought that we would post it. This pikshur is the only one that didn't make mommy's eyes leak - so she was finking all happy foughts about this one.






Wednesday, May 02, 2007

A day in the life of The Meezers

MILES

Here is a typical day in the Meezer house:

Midnight - Sammy stomps up onto the bed and steps on mommy's head as he makes his way to his pillow to sleep.

Midnight-thirty - Sammy whaps mommy in the head wif his tail repeatedly to see if she is sleeping

Midnight-thirty one - Mommy puts a pillow ofurr her head and says "knock it off Sammy"

Midnight-thirty two - Sammy stomps back ofurr Mommy's head and sits on the bedside table.

Midnight-thirty three- Sammy whaps the cell phone off the table and onto the floor

Midnight-thirty three and a half - "Sammy, stop it right now"

Midnight-thirty four - Sammy stomps back ofurr mommy's head and lays back down on his pillow

Midnight-thirty four and a half - Sammy is asleep

Three oh two am - Sammy whaps me in the head - Wrestlemania Eleventy Nine is about to begin

Three oh three am - I jump onto mommy's legs as Sammy and I are in the middle of Wrestlemania Eleventy Nine - Steel Cage ex-trava-ganza

Three oh Three and a half AM - "KNOCK IT OFF YOU TWO"

Three oh Four am - oh! Mommy has to go to the human litterbox room - goody - that means windowsill kissies

Three of Five am - I jump on the windowsill for kissies - I sit ovurr near mommy and reach out and pet her face. She kissies me.

Three oh Six am - Mommy stands up and I stand up on the windowsill on my back legs and grab her face - more kissies.

Three oh Seven am - Mommy picks me up and we goes back to bed.

Five twenty four am - Sammy stands on Mommys head

Five twenty four and two seconds am - "SAMMY, get off my head"

Five twenty four and 10 seconds - Sammy is on the bedside table. You all know what happens next

Five twenty four and 11 seconds - WHAP - cell phone into mommy's head

Five twenty four and 12 seconds - Mommy grabs Sammy and puts him into snuggling posishun

Five twenty five - Mommy and Sammy is asleep. I crawl back unner the covers and sleep on mommy's feets

Six oh eight - Sammy is on the bedside table - again

Six oh eight and 2 seconds - WHAP - remote control for tv flies into Mommy's head

Six oh eight and 3 seconds - Mommy's hand slaps Sammy off bedside table. I jump out from unner the covers and "The Great Meezer Race" is ON!!

Six oh ten - Sammy runs ofurr Mommy's head as I run ofurr her stomach.

Six oh eleventeen - "STOP IT RIGHT NOW"

Six oh eleventeen and 10 seconds - Sammy sticks his head unner the pillow ofurr mommy's face and licks her eye

Six oh twelve - Sammy sits on Mommy's chest and licks her lip

Six oh thirteen - Human litterbox room time again!! YAY! More windowsill kissies

Six oh sixteen - Mommy uses werds from the naughty list while she is on the weighty fing. And tells me to stop standing wif my front paws on her shoulders - seems that I make her gain weight when I does that.

Six twenty - BREKFEST TIME!!!!

Six twenty one - oh, time to play fingers ferst

Six twenty four - BREKKIES!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!

Six thirty - can I haf more brekfest?

Seven am - time to look at our email! and then take a nap

Eight am - can we read some blogs now?

Nine am - nap time

Eleventeen am - is it ham time yet?

Eleventeen oh three - time to go into the kit-chen and holler at the fridge for ham

Eleventeen oh five - MOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMM stop werking and make some lunch - it need some ham

Eleventeen ten - HURRY!!! I need ham now.

Eleventeen eleventeen - YAY!! HAM!!!!

Eleventeen thirty - nap time

One pm - Sammy wants tem-tay-shuns - what does you mean we can't haf any?

One oh one - "SAMMY! Get off the dining room table"

One oh two - "SAMMY! GET OFF THE TABLE"

One oh three - SAMMY! ON THE FLOOR NOW

One oh four - uh oh - she's getting up and steam is coming out of her ears

One oh five - Sammy rolls ofurr onto his back on the dining room table - "oh you're so cute, but get off the table"

One oh six - Mommy picks up Sammy and puts him on the floor

One oh six and fifteen seconds - Sammy is back on the table just as Mommy sits down again.

One oh six and sixteen seconds - "SAMMY - oh nevermind. I have werk to do"

Three pm - Yawn, stretch, smack the lips. Time to go holler at the fridge again

Three oh three - "MILES, stop it, it's not time to eat"

Three oh four - "Miles, really, stop it"

Three oh five - "MILES"

Three oh six - no ham. Time to chase Sammy

Three oh seven - Lap 24,986 of "The Great Meezer Race" begins

Three oh eight - up the stairs, down the hall, into the bedroom, over the bed, around the bottom of the bed, back out to the hall, down the stairs, turn right, down the hall, turn left into the kit-chen, through the dining room, turn left, around the lifing room and back up the stairs

Three twenty - "you sound like a herd of elefants"

Three twenty eight - 10 laps complete. Time for a nap

Five pm - yawn. stretch. is it dinner time?

Five oh one - hollering at the fridge again

Five oh two - DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Five oh four - Mom? is there any more dinner?

Five thirty - mommy sits down wif her dinner - time to jump up and eat what's on the ofurr side of the plate.

Six pm - nap time

Eight pm -baf time in the human litterbox room. Time to lay on the windowsill and wait for windowsill kissies

Eight thirty - windowsill kissie time

Nine pm - nap time while Mommy watches the talking pikshur box

Eleventeen pm - Bed Time

Midnight - it all starts again.

Good thing....

MILES It's a good thing that someone packed snow shoos and warm blankets and stuff.  Lookit where I is now!