Monday, December 08, 2008

Meezer Monday Miles Report

MILES

Here is my report for this meezer monday

The Foods Report - OH CRAPPITY CRAP CRAP CRAP - WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THE WERD DIET??????? ::faints::

SAMMY - errrrrr I gotta go do some paranormal 'vestigating in the basement. and, errrrrrrr, I really doesn't want to be around to hear the whining and moaning and begging that will start when he recovers from his fainting.

BILLY - um, Miles??? why can't we haf bacon anymore??? ::SNIFFS::

MILES: oh, I'm just not in the mood to continue this Meezer Monday Miles report. I might as well just go stare at my empty dish. ........ ::walks off mumbling:: - I know what I'm going to do

AVAILABLE: One 3 year old seal point Meezer. Muscular. Likes: various pork products, as well as most types of poultry and beef. Sitting on people laps and petting people faces. Hiding in tents. wandering around hollering. Dislikes: DIETS. any type of perceived medical intervention, getting eye boogers gouged out, PTU's. In need of a mother type figure who is generous with the pork products. Situation is desperate.

33 comments:

The Whiskers and Purrs Gang said...

Oh, poor sweet Miles...we'll sneak you some foods, 'kay? We'll send it in an unmarked box...be on the look out!

Very truly yours,
The Whiskers and Purrs Gang

William said...

Miles, you could come out here and live with us. You and Caroline could have a SCREAM OFF!

Derby said...

Just because your mum is on a diet, should not mean that you have to be on a diet.

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

Diet! What da heck is a diet...C'mon over here Miles our mom is free wif da bacon ::turkey? it's turkey bacon?:: Can yoo beleeve dat, she slipped us turkey bacon! Well, it's deelishus anyway.

Mr. Echo said...

It is no coincidense that the first letters in diet are D I E.

Victor Tabbycat said...

Dude! That's pretty harsh!
Ok, tell her to getcha a Play-n-Treat ball cuz then you push it to get yur treats an, um, yur working off more calories than what you eats, so then you can haz yur treat ball an bacon too! Amazon, dude. Amazon.com.
Purrs, Victor

PS How's yur Mom's back? I hope that train conductor was able to help.

The Cat Realm said...

We can relate! Our staff ran out of food, can you belief it!!! And the place where they can get it is closed on Sundays. Now we have to wait till tomorrow to have FOOD again!!!!!!!!! How can you run out of FOOD? Cruel people, they are cruel people!
On the other hand - as our basic food is GONE - we will all have stinky goodness for breakfast tomorrow! Gotta look on the bright side...
Unfortunately I don't see that side in your situation......
Maybe a petition....
Mrs. OZ

Max said...

Oh dooooood...not the D word! DO people not realize the first 3 letters spell out D I E???

Puglette said...

miles, come on over! i think you are the mostest handsome cat ever!! i have a pork roast in the fridge and i cooked a turkey tonight!!! i don't think the puggies will chase you too much...
hugs,
puglette
:o)

Evie/VampyVictor said...

OH My... you must have grown might hefty to have to go on a d i e t... wooooooo
hehe
V-V

Karen Jo said...

Uh-oh, Miles. That's a bad word you heard. I hope that either you get used to it, or it doesn't have to last long.

Parker said...

This is very serious indeed!

Goldie, Shade and Banshee said...

Oh Jeeze!!!!

Sorry guys! So close to Christmas????

A sin, that is!

Eric and Flynn said...

Noooooo!!! She can't be serious! Come and stay with us, we've got half a pig in the freezer that you can share.

The Island Cats said...

Oh Miles, we feel for you! Diet is a four letter word!!!

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

that d werd is on my bad werd list! and i think if you don't say it then it won't be there.

smiles, auntie bee
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

DEBRA said...

Psst Miles pleeze watch furr da man in da bloo shorts he will half a box wif yur name on it and der will be lots of oinks in it...juss don't tell yur Mom, OK? What...she can read? no no no ... she won't let yoo half da box of oinks if she can udderstand dis...

Mr Jinx wood sim-paa-size wif yoo becuz he knocks Momma down less dan 1 hr after we eat...

**wavin paws**
Bye Miles
Bye Billy

Boo,Ping,Gracie and Jinx

**blowin kisses**
Bye to my sweet handsome alien chasing floofy meezerman

Purrs and nosekisses
your adoring tiny tuxie princess
Abby

Forty Paws said...

Oh no! No pork parts anymore? What's with that "diet" word? This is too weird!

Luf, Us

Pee Ess. We don't need anymore poodins here.

Cheysuli and gemini said...

Miles: are you on a diet or is your person? I mean ultimately the result is the same but I'm just wondering...

Cafe Cats said...

Oh noeeeeeeeeeees! You gottsa have da meatsies!!

Iago

Gandalf and Grayson said...

Dudes! No more various pork products? That is SO not fair! You have a very interesting and well-rounded resume. We are certain a wonderful Mom Lady Person will scoop you right up!

Shaggy, Scooby and Scout said...

Maybe you & the Basement Meezer at our house could get a place together??

Kellie The Orange Cat said...

Miles, I feel your pain. My Mum is always saying that bad Diet word to me too! I am really only just floofy ; )

China Cat said...

Oh no, your bowl is empty... What a sad day. I hope that your mom realizes that cats need various pork products daily! I personally love ham the best. If we have some I'll try to send you some too!

Purrrrrrrs, China Cat

The Furry Kids said...

Ugh. You can teleport over here any time. There's always a good chance The Mom will just give up and order a pizza and sometimes she even gets bacon on it. heh heh

EG

Camp Stanhope Happenings said...

Miles, don't you know how much your mommy would miss you? Hang in there, things are bound to get better!

Everycat said...

Diet is a cuss word you know.

Whicky Wuudler

Lux said...

Oh my friend, my heart goes out to you. That "diet" word is one I've always hated, too.

{{{hugs}}}

The Devil Dog said...

Oh dear, that sounds very bad. We hope you find a taker for Miles.

Roxy

Mickey said...

Good luck with your ad Miles!!!!! A diet??????? That is a 4 letter word!!!
How could you be deprived of pork?????
Purrs to you bud!!!!!!
Purrs Mickey

seriously amused said...

Oh Miles, I feel your pain. My humans would like me to shed a pound or two. Meanwhile, I'm the most active kitty they've ever met.

They started this dumb rule where I only get 30 minutes to eat my meal before the dish is taken away. But I'm waaay smarter than them. I start eating again just before the timer goes off and of course they feel too guilty to steal the dish whilst I'm eating.

Sending comforting purrs,

Cinza

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Oh, Miles, we would sneak you some goodies but we don't have any either. Maybe we should take out an ad too!

Billy, we're all hopeful you'll be doing better soon.

Sammy, perhaps Miles should help you investigate the basement. Perhaps there are mice down there to help wean him off his pork addiction?

Mrs. Sniffles said...

Oh dear Miles! I hopes you get better real soon. Being dizzy doesn't sound fun at all! But it sounds like it's getting you extra snuggle time and love from your mama, which is always good!

Meezer Monday

MILES Yeah, it's Meezer Monday.  EVERY MONDAY IS MEEZER MONDAY and that woman just does not care.  She doesn't feed me good food...