Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Meezer Rule and Whapping Wednesday

MILES

My important rule for today: booze filled chocolates will make you sick. and maybe drunk. but mostly sick. (I only eated half of one little chocolate bottle, with the 'luminum foil it was wrapped in. NOW she knows that I'M FREAKING HUNGRY).

SAMMY

Guess what, it's a NON WHAPPING report. Some (most, everyone but us 'prolly) of you will have trees in your house for the holiday. To admire. And whap ornaments off the branches. And chew the lights. Well, WE cannot haf a tree this year, 'acuase WE has a BILLY. And a BILLY will destroy the tree. so NO whappable ornaments for us. NO lights to chew through. No presents to bat around. no ribbons to chew through. NO HOLIDAY WHAPPING. I'm 'giskusted. I need a new family.

33 comments:

DaisyMae Maus said...

Oh, goodness! No TREE?!? What was Billy thinking? He cannot eat efurrything 'cuz Meezers need a tree (at least a little one dangled from the light fixture in the dining room, right?).
DMM

William said...

Sorry, Sammy. We're under the same no-tree rule because we have...well, me.

Jan's Funny Farm said...

We've got the same problem, no whapping tree with ornaments. Borrrrrring!

No more eating chocolate or drinking booze!

Camie's Kitties said...

We haven't had a tree in years. There might be one this year - we don't know, but there are little kids in the house so...

Miles are you okay??? Do you have a hangover now?

Tavi, Cody, Camie and Miss Jade

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

sammy i'd get you to move in with me but i don't have a tree either... sorry honey pie.

and miles, that sounds yukkie. did the food person feed you yet honey? want me to whap her one?

smiles, auntie bee
xxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

No tree fur us either Sammy, cuz we haf a Speedy. Dat boy climbs dem! He's nuts so we hafta suffer...

Cheysuli and gemini said...

I whapped several ornaments the moment our tree was up and the humans weren't fussing. I will do it again in honor of you Sammy...

Catzee said...

No Purry Christmas tree!!!!! How come yur mom jus' doesn't get a whappable Purry Christmas tree. She could do that.

Evie/VampyVictor said...

hahah Sammy it is ok, we have no tree here either :) And we do not even have a Billy.. just a lazy Momma that can't be bothered with it all :)
That my man, is reason to be a cranky puss! :)

V-V

Max said...

We're not gonna have a tree either. It really bites, doesn't it? :/

Karen Jo said...

Miles, I bet the aluminum foil helped make you sick, along with the booze and the chocolate. I am glad that you didn't eat much. Just remember that if you eat what you shouldn't, you will barf, then you will be even more hungry. Sammy, I am so sorry that you won't get a tree to whap this year. That is just a crying shame.

Isis said...

Oh this is dreadful new Sammy! :( How can a cat have KissMouse without a tree?! How will SantaPaws know where to bring you presents? I'm furry worried about you all now... Surely Billy's not that silly and some sort of tree is possible? I mean Mummy has a tree and she has a me and I just love to climb stuff - but I'm a good girl and leave the tree alone (even when I'm not being snoopervised!).

Purrs,
Isis
x

Parker said...

This is awful! I look forward to the trees all year - whapping, napping under, sniffing, it's all good!

Eric and Flynn said...

NO TREE?????
That's cruelty to kitties! We look forward all year to the indoor climbing and whapping. We haf a game with mum to see how many ornyments she can find every morning. We haf to find better and better places to hide them so she can still find them weeks after Chris Mouse.The first year,I, Flynn, eatid the electric wire the lights wuz on. Mum sez it wuz lucky they weren't turned on or I could haf turned into a curly cat.I don't do that now though, I only chew the branches.

Gandalf and Grayson said...

No tree? Billy must be an even better whapper than you are, Sammy! We are very impressed! Mom is not putting up her tree this year either, but we still have Nana's little 5' tree. It's not as fun though.

Everycat said...

Sammy I think you won't have time for whapping since Miles appears to be rather keen on the illegal boozy chocolates. Looking after an inebriate cat is hard work

Tee Hee

Whicky

The Furry Kids said...

The Mom got a little tiny prelit tree that she was hoping we'd all be able to enjoy. Until she woke up one morning and found it laying in the kitchen, far, far away from where she put it in the family room. Then she tooked it away. :( We feel your pain. Boo hiss!

EG

DEBRA said...

Sammy
Let me count wif my pawsies..we have one, two, twee ahhh we have a squillion trees cuz Momma puts dem up all ofur da howze. Dey half nuffin on dem 'cept lights so we don't care nuffin bout dem. Momma even put up her Santa Paws on our table and we haven't whapped dem off, we haven't made dem fall down or go boom eiffer. We is bein gud kissmass kitties cuz we wants Santa Paws to bisit us. Yoo can come ofur and I'll show yoo all dat stuffs yoo can whap if'n yoo wants.

Miles honey pleeze be furry karefull wif da boozie chocolattes yoo will be sick and drunk at da same time....

*wavin paws*
Bye Billy
Bye Miles
Boo,Gracie,Ping,Jinx

*blowin kisses*
Bye to my sweet handsome floofy cocoa puffs meezerman
purrs and nosekisses
your adoring tiny tuxie princess
Abby

jenianddean said...

I understand. Our trees aren't up yet because Mom and Dad have been on the go and don't want to leave Maggie alone with the tree for too long because they just don't know what they'll come home to.
--Jasper

The Island Cats said...

Hey, Sammy...why don't you come over here and help us whap our tree???

Cafe Cats said...

Sammy, Sorry about the no whappies. Mama's little tree is too little and too high up for us to get whappies on it.

Miles, Mama hides her boozy candy. Iago would probably nom it all down because they're filled with Baileys.

Sara

Kaze, Latte, & Chase said...

You can come to our house! The Tall man says he doesn't care how "bad" the cats are, he's still having a tree. We don't bother it....too much.

Kaze

Sunny,Scooter,Jamie said...

Oh Sammy!! No tree?? No whapping ornaments???
Now listen, if you do not mind having a dog for a lawyer, I can represent you. (I watch "Boston Legal" on TV with Mom ALL the time)
I know we can go for neglect. And if I catch more reruns I am sure I can come up with more by watching James Spader(mom's fav on BL).
If you are serious about the new home thing we can call CPS-cat protective services. Probably get you in foster care in time to whap someone els's tree.
Let me know.
Hugs
Sunny

Sunny,Scooter,Jamie said...

pee ess
Miles, I can get you placed too, I am sure. I mean, REALLY. Letting you drink alcohol and eat chocolate??? Definite case of neglect.
Sunny the K-9 lawyer

HotMBC and Robyn said...

Miles, yoo gotta come ofur heer and not eet chocklits that makes yoo barf. We can purr for everycat n bean dat needs it too. And snuggle. And not barf all ofur.
Purrrrrrrrs n nosekissies,
yore girlfriendcat Sanjee

Sammy, Come whap some of our holiday stuff, dude. We only have a little tree but we have lots of other stuff around. I can blame the whappin on you and by then you'll be gone. MUAHAHA! ~~The Pepster

Grr, Midnight & Cocoa said...

We won't have any of that stuff either, on account of Rascal, Riley & Midnight, but mostly Riley. ::sigh:: if only cats could be as well behaved as me, Cocoa and Max. Ha! Me, well behaved? That's a first! But it's true, I don't destroy stuff.
Grr

Daisy said...

Sammy, I do not think we are going to have a tree this year either. On account of Harley. He gets into everything. And chews it all up.

Furkidsmom said...

We have two trees - want to come share ours?? Whapping is required!

Sniffie and the Florida Furkids

peggy and The Cats said...

We just luv you, so we have an award for you, come on by and grab it.

Cory said...

We got a tree...we thought Bennette would cause all sorts of trouble with it, but she's actually been good...I was the only one who chewed anything and it got taken away from me...

Shadow / Molly said...

NO TREE? WTP! Oh dat will NOT do!! What if yoo gotted a tree wif only plastic whappin ornaments on it fer now? Wudnt that count as a gud try at lettin Billy try to be a gud kitty?

FrecklesandDeb said...

Oh, Miles! How sad that you got sick from the booze filled chocolate piece! We'd say that we guess you've learned your lesson -- but you probably haven't (Hee, hee)

Sammy, we're so sorry that you won't have a tree this year. But, we're sure you will find something else to whap instead!

The Devil Dog said...

that is very sad news. You will have to teach Billy what NOT to do to a tree. That way you can have one next year.

Roxy

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