Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Wanted: A new The Mom

MILES

Wanted: A new The Mom

Requirements: 
Must like HAM
Must like FRENCH TOAST
Must MAKE FRENCH TOAST on a weekly basis
Must like to have kitties laying on her lap, face, head, chest and bladder
Must not have the following diseases: The Shingles, The Creeping Crud or Allergies
Must remember to keep the crunchy bowl filled at all times
Must remember to scoop the litterboxes each time one of us uses them
Must stay home and not drive 90 miles one way to werk
Must like eye boogers where they are 
Must NOT run the sucky monster - ever

Must never say "this is too spicy and it will light your butt on fire" 
Must NOT be on "nootra-system" 
Must always keep a supply of stinky goodness and NOT run out


In trade you will receive: 


A sneezy, wheezy, cranky, rash-y, scratchy, teeny bladder, forgetful, spicy food loving, eye booger hating, used The Mom. 

 

18 comments:

Barb and TheDailyGs said...

Well, that seems perfectly reasonable.

Oh, and I'm trying out a new recipe for French Toast Casserole this weekend, if you'd like a little something to hold you over.

Tom, Tama-Chan, Sei-Chan, Bibi-Chan, Gen-Chan, Vidock said...

Well let's see... Ours cleans the litter box constantly, never runs out of our food, likes (and dishes out) ham, works at home (except for all that horse stuff...), does not like spicy food, appears to be disease-free at the moment, is not on "nootra" whatever, and is generally good about us being all over her, BUT although she loves French toast, she has never, ever made it! Plus, we are NOT giving her up!!!

Purrs,
The Chans

Hannah and Lucy said...

We don't think our Mum would be much use to you boys - she does like ham and we get some, she stays home nearly all the time, but she hates french toast, loves spicy food, although we think she is disease free she is mental - she admits to that herself and mutters something about how easy life would be if she didn't have two furry maniacs - but we have never met them!
Luv Hannah and Lucy xx xx

William said...

My mom fainted at "Must stay home and not drive 90 miles one way to werk"!

Mine doesn't but she couldn't replace your mom, Miles!

Cheysuli and gemini said...

Umm... we don't need a used The Mom. Ours is bad enough.

Katie Isabella said...

Can't exchange mom's YET...but check back..she may have to be put up on the rack and have werk done..xoxox

fivecats said...

Did you check eBay or Amazon? You might be able to find a new The Mom at a lower price.

Pierro said...

How about Hamfrenchtoast cuppiecakes? Do you like them?
We are sorry your The Mom is suffering so much. Perhaps she needs a month at the spa. What could be fun is if you kitties put on little bonkie waiter outfits and serve her... you know, training, show her how it's bonked!

Two French Bulldogs said...

we never saw a fired up butt
Benny & Lily

Derby, Ducky said...

Right now we can't trade mum. She is so hurty at times and she won't let us sleep with her or climb on her.

Tillie and Georgia said...

One slight adjustment Miles.
" Must make French Toast" on a weekly basis AND feed it to me" !!!
After all, YOU want to do the eating! heeheehee

Purrs Tillie and Georgia,
Tiger,Treasure and JJ

The Island Cats said...

We've got our own problem mom, Miles.

Sweet Purrfections said...

Your poor mom!

Truffle and Brulee

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

We would trade wif yoo but we already haf one just like dat. Oh, she likes ham and makes french toast occasionally, but, she's sneezy, weezy and itchy. Her eyes water and get glops of goo in them which makes her check OUR eyes and clean da eye boogers out. She'll clean da litter box twice a day, but, she sez stoopid stuff like "man, you guys stink" and "how the heck do you manage to poop in such quantity" while she's doing it. Whine, complain and say bad werds, we think it's a mom thing.

Oui Oui said...

Well, our mom was doing pretty good until you got to the eye booger part, the sucky monster and the spicy food, so we guess no trade. Oh, and ours whines a lot too.

Prancer Pie said...

Sounds like a good deal to us. You think we could get a "twofur"?

Elizabeth and Connor said...

Ours isn't much better! Plus sometimes she claims she's too incoherent from being over-worked to do a decent blog post!

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Wow, what a trade. Good luck.

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