Monday, December 29, 2014

Meezer Monday Sad report


ME has a very big sad - mine orinch mancat hero Derby wented to the Bridge.  He was mine hero, he teached ME how to be a mancat, and walk on the ceiling (and drink niptinis).  ME will miss him very much.  

We will post our Secret Paws pikshurs (the mom lady person made us wait until chrissymouse to open them) tomorrow.  

For right now, this song is dedicated to Derby 

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

The Night before a Meezer Chrissymouse

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The stockings were hung by the TV with care,
In hopes that St. Santy Paws soon would be there;

The Meezers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of mischief danced around in their heads;
And the mom in her tank top and, loaded on booze
Had just settled down for a long winter's snooze.

When down in the living room there arose such a clatter,
The mom sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the stairs she stumbled and bumbled,
“oh. Holy ()*^&*(*( not again this year” she mumbled.

The hall light shone bright as in an interrogation room
we were all worried about the impending doom!
When, what to the mom’s wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and three tiny cat-deer,

With a little old driver, so tilty and slick,
I knew in a moment it must be that ()&**(^^*^ Nick.
The mom gathered her thoughts, fell down the stairs,
with a bump and a thump and a few pulled out hairs;

"Now, Miles! now, Billy! now, Sammy stop slacking!
On, Meezers on Orinch Meniss, and stop all that clacking!
To the top of the couch! to the shelf on the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

This dry leaves line is so very obtuse,
but it does rhyme with our calling the mother a moose,
So up to the buffet they clamored and flew,
With the sleigh full of toys, and St Fuzzypants too.

And then, in a crashing she heard from the hall
The kicking and scratching of each little paw.
As she got to her feet and looked all around ,
Down from the buffet they all fell with a bound.

Sammy was crying and Miles was screaming,
This was ruining all of their Chrissymouse scheming;
A bundle of toys they were looking to pillage,
And then set to ransacking the Chrissymouse village.

We started to move, like nothing had happened
But then we noticed that Sammy was flattened,
She saw it too and she ran to his side,
And picked him up and then she cried

Sammy looked at his brothers and gave them a wink!
And then looked at the mom, who’s breath really did stink
She was crying and blubbering, and squishing poor Sammy
who was not enjoying this because mom’s hands were all clammy;

The rest of the kitties started yelling and crying
They put on a show like poor Sammy was dying
The hollering! The crying! The wailing and bawling!
They sure put on a show that was kind of appalling.

Sammy lifted his head and whispered to her
I’m ok Mamma, and then started to purrr;
The mom kissed his head and put him back down ,
Stood up and gave each of them a bit of a frown;

“you naughty meezers, you’re my heart and soul,
but if you try it again, Santa will leave you some coal.
Then we heard her sigh and turn out the light,
"Merry Chrissymouse my Meezers, go to bed and good night."

Monday, December 22, 2014

Deer Santy Paws


Deer Santy Paws

I think that I has been a good boy this year.  When I try and trick mine brofur Miles into a box, I's just hafing fun wif him.  He LOVES it!!!

When I think about chrissymouse time, I think that I am the luckiest kitty in the werld, 'acause mine Gotcha Day is at chrissymosue time.  It was a great purresent for me to get mine mommy and she was furry furry luck to get me as a chrissymouse purresent too.  I mean, who wouldn't want a soft fuzzy meezer kitten for chrissymouse? 

Mine only chrissymouse wish is for everycat to get a home and be someone's chrissymouse purresent.  

Oh, and please tell the mom to go back to the crunchies we were eating before.  These new crunchies are awful and we are all starving.  


Your furriend

Nicholas Fuzzypants Meezer (I guess I will always haf to wear the fuzzy pants). 

Thursday, December 18, 2014

drama drama drama


Oh my cat - that woman STILL has a drain in.  You would think that she would have sucked up all of the water in the world by now, but apparently she is supposed to be getting RID of stuff, and it's still there and requires more of Aunty's Bio-tics.  The worst part of all of this is that she is NOT ALLOWED to pick us all up, because, apparently we are TOO FAT and weigh over 10 pounds. This is not sitting well with any of us 'acuase we demand to be picked up and stuff.  And Billy, well once he is picked up he never wants to get down. 

So we are going to advertise for a servent person to come and carry us around until that woman is fixed.  or healed.  MOL 

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

MINE chrissymouse list


Deer Santa Paws

ME has been a good boy all year - ME has made furriends wif many woofies and ME has made furriends wif many peoples.  ME does not unnerstand why the mom lady person does not like ME to go outside - ME loves rolling around on the warm driveway thingy, or the sidewalk thingy, and ME likes slinking around in the grass, it tickles mine belly.  

ME does not want much for chrissymouse - ME just wants mine own baby. Nicky is all growed up now and ME needs another baby. 

Thursday, December 11, 2014

I think I better write this now


Deer Santa Paws

Normally I am a good boy - I protekt the house and that woman from aliens and ghosts all year, and it's exhausting.  I do a good job and in return I get kissies and scritchies from that woman and I get to sleep in her arms most of the night.  

HOWEVER, it has come to my attenshun that once last week, when I was just exhausted from keeping the aliens away from the house, that I told mine baby brofur Nicholas that you did not exist.  Now, I really did not mean it, I KNOW you is real.  But he was annoying me and trying to chase me around the house, and I was so tired.  Billy told him to stop because you were watching extra close, and I just blurted out that you was not real.  It made Nicky and Billy cry.  I is the oldest and wisest and the smartest, so they believed me.  Please forgive me Santa, I KNOW you is real and I hope that you will reconsider the coal I am sure to get in mine stocking.  

Love always
Your friend and bestest Meezer buddy
Samuel Alfonse (ELF-onse?) Meezer

PEE ESS: does you still like chocolate chip cookies? I will try and leave some milk out, but we are all tempted to drink it before you get here.  How about some beer? Or maybe Vodka? we has LOTS of that in the house, that woman drinks alot. 

PEE ESS ESS:  Miles told me to tell you that mine statement about that woman drinking alot is not troo. I apologize to you and that woman for the lie.  Maybe you can drop off a coal burning furnace with that load of coal I will be getting in mine stocking.  



Monday, December 08, 2014

Meezer Monday Miles Report


Here is the Meezer Monday NICKY report

The Miles report - he's a little upset 'acause he did not get French toast this weekend. And he was not allowed to slap his paws into mommy's mashed potatoes last night.  Or pet her steak.  Personally, I think the mommy was a little mean about it all. 

The Billy report - Mine brother is kind of not good. He's wheezing a lot more lately.  mommy thinks it's the cold weather.  

The Sammy Report - Sometimes when our naybor comes up Sammy follows mommy around and hollers are her - especially when she is in the kitchen with the naybor.  It's kind of funny 'acause mommy says he sounds like he is dying.  And I guess he does.  And he smacked Miles in the head last night for trying to sleep in his spot on the bed.  I told him that Santa does not like that and he told me that Santa does not exist.  WHAT????????

The mommy report - the mommy STILL has her drain in - I don't know what she is trying to drain. It doesn't drain the tub or anything when she is in it.  But she has to change bandages and stuff all the time and she says it hurts 'acause it's right where her pants and stuff are on her waist.  Oh, and I keep jumping on it.  Mommy says Santa does not like that, so I has to write a letter to Santa soon to 'splain stuff.  

That is the Meezer Monday Nicky report 

Wednesday, December 03, 2014

Is it too early for mine Dear Santa Paws letter?


Dear Santa Paws

I have been a good boy this year.  I think that because mine brofurs have played tricks on me like getting me into boxes and sending me places, I deserve some extra credit in the "good" department.  I does not have a very long list of things I would like for Chrissymouse, but here it is

1.  A personal chef to make me French Toast and Ham whenever I want it. And for the woman to not tell me to stop slapping her when she's trying to eat. 
2.  A personal groomer to get "that spot" on mine back
3.  The spot next to the woman on the bed when it's sleepy time. 
4.  I would like for mine Angel Sanjee to keep watching over me all the time.  
5.  more kisses from the woman
6.  I would like all furries to have homes and toys and food and love. 

I think that's it.  Again, I believe I has been a good boy this year so I think that maybe 2 or 3 things from mine list would be good.  It's your choice, but number 1 is mine most wanted wish.   

Update on us

SAMMY I had a v-e-t appointment last week and the v-e-t is kind of werried 'acause i might haf another skin cancer starting.  she will...