Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Tuesdays with Bill

BILLY
Me needs advice!!
Ok, me is now calling the lady "the mom". And the mom likes that. At bedtime, the mom carries me upstairs and gives me my stinky goodness and water and steals my poops (how weird is that? why would she want them? me didn't want them that's why me pooped them!). But she saided yesterday that my belly is getting big and that me should NOT haf stinky goodness at night when she puts me in my jail cell
(Mom's note: he has a HUGE pen with food and toys and a bed and fleece blankies and a litterbox! Sammy and Miles are envious!) How does me convince mommy to still gives me stinky goodness in my jail cell at night? And stinky goodness in the morning? And maybe at dinner? After all, she leaves me wif the meezers ALL DAY long!






39 comments:

DaisyMae Maus said...

Oh, dood! That's a connundrum! You've got it pretty rough with stinky goodness three times a day AND two Meezers for brothers. Sigh. What to do ... what to do?

I highly suggest whining a whole lot. Make yourself a nuisance 'bout the canned food an' your momma will HAVE to give you some, right?

Good luck!

DMM

Empress Bee (of the High Sea) said...

what about being really really nice to sammy and i know he will give you some of his HAM! what about that? har har

smiles, auntie bee
xoxoxoxoxoxxxoxxoxox

Derby said...

That sad look of yours should do it Billy. Otherwise, lots of talking, all night, every night. Make so much noise that your tummy is empty and she needs to fill it so you will keep quiet.

Skittles, The Huntress said...

Dear Bill,

You sound like me when I was young. See my bio on my site.

I was abandoned and starving. So when I found my second pet human, and she took me home, all I wanted to do was EAT, EAT, EAT, EAT, EAT!!!!!

I ate everything!

And I had to stay in my own room away from the other kitties....I even had my own cat run (how embarrassing...only dogs have "runs".)

You will calm down when you realize that you finally have your forever home, and you will always have food and love.

Try yoga.

Luv,
Skittles, The Huntress

Willow said...

Oh, Billy, I think that you are lucky to get stinky goodness. I only eat crunchies but I like them and eat a lot of them!

Purrrrrrrs, Willow

Renee said...

I think the whining about it when she's good and sleepy will help you to get the stinky goodnesss!

Cheysuli and gemini said...

I think you deserve stinky goodness whenever you want it. How could anyone think a cat didn't? Unless that person was my human

Tara said...

Sads looks and pathetic cries usually work.

When do you think the mom might spring you from the cell for the nights?

Tara

Grr, Midnight & Cocoa said...

We have five of us and we get 4 cans of stinky goodness in the morning (to share) and 4 more cans at night (to share), plus we have crunchies all the time. The only one of us that's fat is Grr, and she's not even the biggest eater. Some kitties just are bigger and have bigger tummies. You might be one of those extra cuddly ones. Your mom should enjoy that. More to love - that's what we say!

Camie's Kitties said...

We think that you are just making up for lost time. We seem to recall a time when the mom worried about you not wanting to eat or drink, and now she is concerned about you eating too much. Maybe she could give you some temptations right before bed as a bedtime snack instead of Stinky Goodness?

Tiki, Tavi, Cody and Camie

Frostin said...

Billy,

Maybe you need more exercise. Contact Max and Buddah and ask them to teach you and the meezers to play thundering herd of elephants. That should keep you fit.

*wink*

Parker said...

I can't say enough about the power of whining.

Christine and FAZ said...

My humans often put me on a diet and I am svelte - what is it with these humans and weight - they're obsessed - cats are meant to e cuddly. FAZ

DEBRA said...

Billy
Da fastest way is da loudest way and also werk in sum reely paatetic glances like yu is reely sufferin frum da last throws of hunger and star-va-shun. Werk on it I am sur the Mommie will give in, mine always does...hehehehehe...maybes dat is why I am gettin a bit, oooo, dar I say floofier?

**wavin paws**
Bye Billy
Bye Miles

**blowin kisses**
Bye to my sweet handsome floofy cocoa puff meezer man...

Purrs and nosekisses
Your adoring little tuxie princess
Abby

Cecilia, The 2Bs & Madness said...

We think you are lucky to get stinky goodness. Our Mom is very cruel and won't give it to us! Well sometimes, maybe once a week we get to share one little can of Sheba, but that is it!

Maybe she can still give you stinky goodness, but just a little bit less?

Mickey said...

Lay down in your jail as if you passed out and give your Mom the saddest look you can!!! Cood luck,heehee
Purrs Mickey

Dragonheart & Merlin said...

Billy, that's a very good question! Maybe you should play more, so that you burn lots of calories and need the stinky goodness to stay healthy? It works for us!

Gandalf & Grayson said...

Well Billy, if you don't get your own, you simply will have to learn to steal the Meezer's!

Captain Jack and Sir Dante said...

Do what I do Billy. Look cute and sad and pitiful all at once, throw in a few meows for good measure, and try to climb up Mommy's leg. I do that and she gives me treats - its amazing. I'll show you! I'm on my way ofur to PLAY and PLAY and PLAY!! WOOHOO!! PLAYPLAYPLAY!! - Fagin

Junior said...

I feel your pain orange brother! I want more food! I want my food and the other cats food! So I go take it and I get in trouble! I haven't been able to convince my Meowm to give me more stinky goodness either, so I have no suggestions for you.

Incidentally, apparently I have put on some weith too! That is what they said at the v-e-t place.

Junior said...

Ummm...that is supposed to be weight.

Orion

Scooby, Shaggy & Scout said...

Well you are a growing boy Billy and still young, your belly won't look big after your next growth spurt!
But if your mom is concerned maybe she should just cut back on the amount of stinky goodness she gives you at one time. That's what she's doing with Shaggy & he's starting to lose weight, finally!
(She is silly with those poops. We thinks she has issues.)

Eric and Flynn said...

Hmmm don't know about the whining. You want to yell at the top of your voice. That's what I do when the Stinky Goodness has all gone in the middle of the night.Mum yells back at me,"Flynn will you shut up" then dad mumbles"what's all the noise?" so then mum gets out of bed and gives me half a sachet of Gourmet and tells me to eat up and go to sleep like a good boy.Then she goes back to bed, and half an hour later Eric goes and walks all over her and sez he wants crunchies. She knows there'll still be crunchies in the kitchen so she pulls the covers over her head and sez, "Eric, I'm trying to sleep, go and annoy your dad."

Tybalt said...

Just give her the cute little kitten eyes and call her "mommy" - that STILL works for me, and I'm a grown mancat.

Daisy said...

Oh Billy, I wish I knew the answer to that. I only get a measly 1/3 can of Stinky Goodness to last me all day! (Along with a bowl of crunchies).

Kaze, Latte, & Chase said...

Its a matter of thievery and blame placing. You have to steal it and then blame a meezer. Meezers are the best scape goats!!!

Chase

The Furry Kids said...

Little dude, this is a problem. Hollering in the middle of the night usually works. That's how we ended up getting 3 meals a day, instead of just two. Even though I think the portions are smaller...
Good luck, Bill!

EG

Aoise said...

I cwy and I haf a very tiny little sweeky cwy that makes Miewmie gif in to me efery time. Twy it !!

Tyler said...

Oh Bill, you have gotten so much great advice here. I have to tell you that my brother Jake, who could be your twin by the way, has it down pat. You have to act like your just starving starving starving. When mom starts to go anywhere in the house Jake starts running in circles, screamin and a yellin and trying to get her to go to the kitchen and get out the stinky goodness. Now if she goes near the stinky stuff, you got to reach up and claw her butt or jump up on the counter so that you can see exactly what she's up to. At the same time, you must continue with the song and dance. You're trying to remind her of how poorly you had it when you first came to her. Look pitiful and hungry. And when you do get the stinky stuff, you're supposed to purrrrr super loudly and give her full body rubs as she scoops the stuff out. You have to tell the mom when she's done a good job. You can't just complain when she doesn't know what to do. And tell your mom not to worry about your furchin. The tabbies are suppose to have some extra something to hold onto. The lines are there to cover up the extra weight. I think.

The Devil Dog said...

Hey Bill, you need to grow in an area other than your stomach if you want more stinky goodness. Luckily for me, I lost weight so I got to eat almost anything I wanted. The bad news is I am where I should be now, which means mom cut back. Argh!

Roxy

zevo hussein calamari said...

Make her feel guilty. Look adorable but sad. Meanwhile we will sneak you in some food when she is gone!

xoxoxo

Grr, Midnight & Cocoa said...

hey...didja get a pakidge? it wuz supposta be there by last Fryday.

Jimmy Joe said...

Hey there Billy--I gotta tell you, I don't get the stinky goodness, but I stare at Momma and get right in her face until she gives me more crunchies. After all, why would she not want more orange belly to rub?
Your buddy, Jimmy Joe

DaisyMae Maus said...

Billy ... I tagged you for a MEME! It's in my 5/21/08 post! Stop by, okay?

DMM

Veronica (& Fig) said...

that's so coincidental, our mommy steals our poops too. but dad never steals them.

The Taylor CatSSSSS said...

Hi my Billy Sweet Feets! You look so adorable in that picture. I would give you anything you wanted! I find you irresistible! You are so adorable!!!
Love from Auntie Deb

Billy, seriously, our Mommy is in love with you! You have such a sweet Mommy. Your jail doesn't sound too bad! Come over and visit us sometime! We let Mommy up from bed rest so that we could visit our friends!

blkcatgal said...

Billy, our mom takes our poops too. And sometimes they really stink. Not like stinky goodness, though. Really bad stink!!

Wally, Ernie & Zoey
**visit us at www.island-cats.com**

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

Der must be something wrong wif all da beans, we hear dat dey steal poops from da kitties alla time! Dat's disgusting. About da food, we think dat yoo maybe think dat every meal might be da last one yoo get. Sadie hadded dat prollem when she gots to da shelter, she gobbled food like a little piggy and if dey gave her food dat was apposeta last til dinner she would eat da whole bowl up at once! She started getting a big belly until dey started dividing her food up into small meals thru out da day. After a while she knew she wouldn't starve and now she is free to eat whenever she wants. But she is still chubby...hehehe

Skeeter, LC, and Ayla said...

When the Mom wakes up in the mornin, lie on yer back wif yer feet up in the air an dont move when she calls you. Mebbe she will think ya starve ta death overnight...

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