Meezer Rule and Whapping Wednesday

MILES

My rule for today: if you want to stay on the mom's good side, do NOT try and eat her leg while she is brushing her teefs. No matter how starving you are.

SAMMY

More questions to answer!! WOO HOO!

Miss Zevo Calamari asks: Thanks for all the whapping tips. My pet human said i am being very rude since i whapped Nubi when he came home from the hospital.What do you think? I really think he deserved it.
Dear Fearless Pooses for Peace Leader Zevo: No, you're not rude. If he smelled funky you have every right to whap him. But don't make it a habit.

Daisy asks: Can I ask you a whapping question? I like to whap my sister, Pixie, but she always tries to whap me back. Is it better to whap and run?
Dear Daisy: Yes, whapping and running is preferred, but, maybe you could let Pixie get in one whap a week to make her feel good. I'm sure she probably doesn't whap really hard, right? If she did, then you can whap her back and run.

Ayla asks: So I haf a question. When whapping soft fuzzy stuff, should it be claws or no claws? With claws, stuff sticks to my paws an thats fun, but Im worried thats more "playin" than "whappin".
Dear Ayla: well, yes, that is more playing than whapping, but remember, whapping first and foremost should be fun!

Angus asks: Your Total Whap-ness:What's the highest object you've ever whapped, and what happened after you whapped it?
Dear Angus: I whapped our squillion Seville off the entetainment center, about 5 1/2 feet off the ground. Mommy was MAD. but Billy recently pulled her off it and now she needs facial reconstructive sugery.

Chey and Gemini ask: This was very good advice on whapping Sammy. Now, is there anything too heavy to avoid whapping? I mean like computer monitors or printers? I have been known to whap at them but they don't go anywhere. Should I stop wasting my time?
Dearest Chey and Gemini: um, no not really. I haf whapped heavy lamps, ceramic heaters, and once even a whole end table!! You need to put a little "oomph" behind it - or maybe tag team it.

Auntie Bee asks: i whapped sarge a really really good one the other night. he said "hey" real loud. what does he mean by this? he was sleeping at the time of course. i would never whap him if he was awake! i'm not stupid!!!
Dear Auntie Bee (we loves you!): I'm sure Sarge was going to say "HEY! That was a great whap" but he fell asleep before he could finish the sentence. Keep up the good whapping!

Tigmut'hep asks: need advise on whapping kittens... I'm purrfectly capable of whapping 'em, it's the getting away with it bit that I totally suck at. :( Any ideas as to how I can get away with more kitten whapping and not getting caught and told off?!
Dear Tig: Oh I feel your pain brother!!! whap and run, just whap and run!!!

Chase ask: Dear SMART meezers (my family excluded),What are the rules with tail whapping? I find that I can flick stuff off of tables and keep that "who me" look thing going but the humans appear to be catching on fast. I think its the noise. How can I make tail whapping quieter?
Dear Chase - its always better to whap stuff onto the carpet for optimum noise reduction. If you must whap onto something harder, make sure to move your tail to the opposite side of your body as fast as possible. Also, curl it around your front feet as you sit there looking all innocent

Captain Jack and Dante ask: Okay whapping question - how hard must one whap to shut that little brat up? We keep whapping and whapping Fagin but he just pays no attention. Perhaps whaps do not have an effect on stupid kittens? Or are we not whapping him often enough?
Dear Captain Jack and Dante: ::SIGH:: our kitten LIKES being whapped. So we just whap harder and more often. It's fun fo us so we don't care.

Eric and Flynn ask: We are furry inchrested in all your whapping tips, but we haf a furry seeryuss kweschun. Mum has big white grass in a big pot in the lounge. She calls it Pampas grass. Well yesterday it wuz hot and she had all the windows and doors open, but it wuz windy and the grasses blew ofurr. We didn't whap them ofurr. We came indoors and we knew sumfing wus diffrunt so we bofe floofed up and stalked them, then we started whapping them. What we want to know is, is it ok to floof up and whap at the same time, cuz mum wuz laffing at us and we don't want her to fink we wuz skeered.
Dear Eric and Flynn - ferst, did you whap your mum for laffing at you? that's just rude. Second, you have every right to floof up and whap when something invisdible knocks something over. After all, you never know when your whapping will make something invisdible turn visdible.