Monday, December 14, 2015

It's Monday and I'm feeling

MILES

It's Monday and I's feeling like I should write mine letter to Santy Claws.  

Deer Santy Claws

Do you think I has been a good boy this year? If so, then I would like some ham, turkey, bacon, chick-hen and cow all wrapped up in a nice big sammich.  Don't werry, it won't go bad, I will eat it fast.  

If I has not been a good boy, here are the reasons: 

1.  Nicky jumps on me and makes me scream like a little girl

2.  Sammy punches me and makes me scream like a little girl

3.  I do NOT scream like a little girl

4.  The mom does not follow me when I go into another room so I has to holler at her.  A LOT. 

5.  Is it really wrong that I sinff mine brother's, um, boo-tay and then try and kiss the mom? She says it's gross.  I say I has to make shur that mine brothers are who they say they are.  

6.  I do get impatient when I's waiting for the mom to finish eating her dinner and give me some - so I does smack the plate or try and pull the foods out of her hand.  But it's her fault - she does not give me foods ferst. If she would give me mine foods ferst, none of that would happen. 

7.  I did sneak a bite of something called an en-cha-la-da last night.  Flames did NOT shoot out of mine butt. The mom is a liar.  And I told her, but apparently that was WRONG.  

8. Sometimes I gets sad or upset when I read or hear about any animal being abandoned or abused, and I holler about it. The mom does not unnerstand and hollers at me to stop hollering at her. 

To sum it all up Santy Paws, I am woefully misunnerstood and I think that I has been a good boy, but sometimes I get confuzzled on the whole "good and bad" thing.  I does try though.  That counts for something, right? 

14 comments:

The Island Cats said...

Miles, we think you've been very good and Santa Paws should bring you lots of stuff.

Two French Bulldogs said...

Apparently you are the only one getting a gift
Snorts,
Lily & Edward

Jans Funny Farm said...

Miles, we understand your predicament. It's tough to be not an only cat sometimes. We hope you get lots of good gifts. You have to be good at least once in a while. Right?

da tabbies o trout towne said...

dood....we due knot see any thing wrong with yur list N until ewe iz prooved
knot guiltee.... ewe did noe wrong......N bye de way, flames canna come outta yur
butt...that trix iz ree served for peepulz when they come home frum werk....we haz seen it furst hand.... sew due knot bee fooled by that flames N butt lie yur mom toll ya ~~~~~~ ♥♥♥

pilch92 said...

I hope Santa brings you everything you want.

Mickey's Musings said...

That letter is a winner and sure to win Santa over.
Not that he needs convincing. He knows you are good all the time :)
We do too.
Purrs Georgia and Julie,
Treasure and JJ

Just Ducky said...

I hope you get what you wants for Christmouse AND you are a good boy.

Mark's Mews (Marley, Lori, Loki, and Binq) said...

We purr for you Miles!

Meezer's Mews & Terrieristical Woofs said...

What a great letter; since your honesty shines so brightly ...yes you are a furry good kitty. Santa Claws will surely take note:))

Memories of Eric and Flynn said...

Santa Claws knows you are a good boy Miles and he understands that no-one else understands you. I understand you too because I also holler a lot.

Zippy, Sadie, Speedy and M'Gee said...

Mmm mmm dat sounds like a good sammich...oh, and we all know Sandy Claws never puts kitties on da nawty list.

Tama-Chan, Benny, Vidock, Violette, Ollie, Heloise, Momo, Ryu said...

We know that you're a really good boy, Miles, and we hope that you will get all those fixings for Christmas!

Purrs,
The Chans

cheryl said...

well, dood, if he don't unnerstan you after THIS 'splanashun, he just ain't the santy claws he useta be! good luck!!

Robyn and The (Mostly) Badass Cat said...

Deer Miles,
Yoo is a GOOD boy. Periot.
purrrrrrs n nosekissies,
yore furever girlfriendcat Sanjee

Good bye my sweet Nicky

 Good bye my sweet sweet Nicky.  You has a hard time sometimes with your brain injury, but you were always so sweet.  I love you to the moon...