Thursday, January 31, 2008
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
well, it's been a week of lessons. mainly concerning my use of my teefs this week. (don't get mommy started that my teefs might be herting me) so my rule is this:
learn what the sensitive parts of your human's face are and DON'T Bite them - unless you want to be called a "little freak".
ok, ferst, my original plan of posting a video of me whapping stuff off the dining room table was dashed last night when mommy picked up the camera and the yelled some werds from the bad werd list. Apparently, sometime after the whapping video and last night, she erased EFURRYFING from the camera. I am furry disappointed in her.
So......... this week I am going to talk about sibling whapping.
There are various sibling whapping techniques that I would like to discuss. (there are pointers here for those cats without siblings too)
1. The drive by whapping. this is especially effective if your sibling is napping and you are not . just run by and whap an ear. guaranteed to make your sibling sit up and take notice. For those if you with no siblings do a drive by on the leg of your human.
2. The instigator whap. especially effective when you want to rassle with your sibling. This includes laying your ears flat, reaching your paw out to touch your siblings head and then raising is up fast and slamming it down on top of their head.
For those of you without siblings, when your human is petting you, lay your ears flat and then at the earliest opportunity, haul off and whap their hand. DO NOT use your claws. This may get you some fun arm rassling action.
3. The cranky whap. To be used whenever you just are in a bad mood. this is the time where you just walk up to your sibling and smack them on the head - hissing is optional. I do not recommend this tactic for kitties with no siblings as this leads to cranky humans as well.
Try these tactics out this week and see how much fun they are!
Monday, January 28, 2008
Mommy says I'm cranky. Sammy snuggled me all day yesterday, which he has NEFUR done since I moved in here when I was a baby (snuggling was grampa norton's job). So, I repaid him last night by smacking him in the face and biting his ear. Why? because he looked at me weird. Mommy says he can't help it because he has crossed eyes, but i say he was looking at me weird.
I guess he won't be snuggling me again any time soon
Crappity crap crap crap - what do you mean that I could not haf winned the South Africa AND Netherlands lotteries because I didn't buy any tickets? The EMAIL says I winned, so somebody must haf buyed tickets for me. The email would not lie. It clearly says I WINNED. I'm gonna buy the tem-tay-shuns factory.
Meezer Mom: Miles, that's called SPAM email, and it's not true.
MILES: but............. read it! It says I WINNED. and SPAM is yucky canned ham-like-food-product. It can't even be sent over the innernets. so you're just making that up.
SPAM mail, sheesh. does you think I'm STOOPID or somefing?
Friday, January 25, 2008
Thursday, January 24, 2008
The rules are: you have to post who tagged you and link back to them and then to petspics.blogspot.com.
Then you have to tag 3 other kitties, beans, woofies, or any other assorted animal.
What three things would you do that you have never done before, if you knew you wouldn't get caught, get in trouble, or suffer any consequences?
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
It's Meezer Rule Wednesday! My rule for today is:
Be careful where you use your "claw of doom" - bean hineys may be fleshy, but for some reason they are furry sensitive to being poked.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
We has been tagged for a new meme by our friends Panda Bear, Padre and Meerkat!
This is a cool meme!
Here are the rules:
Post a link to the kitty who tagged you, and post the rules on your blog.
List your real name, how you got your real name, nicknames you like/tolerate, and nicknames you wish your humans would stop calling you.
Tag several kitties, and write a comment on their blog to let them know they have been tagged.
Ok I will go first:
Sammy - Sammy is maybe my real and true name that I whispered to my mommy. It's either that or Wilson, but I will never tell her, because I refuse to answer to ANY name. EVER. You can look at me and be 3 inches from my face and scream SAMMY LOOK AT ME and I will not look at you. I do NOT come running when my name is called (unlike some other meezer who lives here). my full name is Samuel Alfonse Meezer (SAM)
Nicknames I like/tolerate being called: Whappy Whapinator, the Wapmeister, the Whapinator (my superhero persona).
Nicknames I do NOT like: Sam-sam bam-bam. SQUISHY. bam-bam. angel pie. sam-sam. samuel. special angel. baby face. cross eyed goober. cutie patootie butt. sweetie petit-ee. angel pie guy.
My real name is Miles. I gotted this name because Daddy is weird. See, he named the other kitties that came before, Trixie, Norton and Ralph from some old TV show. Mommy named Sammy (see above) and when she gotted me, my name from my first daddy was Whitey, which was kind of stoopid. So she asked Daddy to name me and he came up with Miles. Sam and Miles were characters in some weird movie called The Maltese Falcon. I've seen the movie. Daddy is obviously color blind as he only knows characters from black and white movies and TV.
Nicknames I like/tolerate: I only haf one nickname. POOSIE.
Nicknames I hate: POOSIE (although I do sometimes come running when mommy calls that name).
George, Max, Tipper and Misty
Scooby, Shaggy and Scout
the gang at Whiskers and Purrs
Monday, January 21, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
We gotted this award from the lovely Miss Isis! Thank you so much Isis, we really appreciate it!
Here are the things we gotted from Tyler and from Junior! Awsome slippers and treats from Tyler and a mitten wif cool mousie toys and treats from Junior. Mommy hadded to put them all together when we gotted them, because we kept whapping stuff around, plus I kept wandering off wif the treats.
Friday, January 18, 2008
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Our mother is USELESS. We haf pikshurs on the camera to post and she cannot find the cord to go from the camera to the 'puter.
Does anyone know where we can get a new one? - Um, mother, not camera cable. I'm shur a new mother would be able to find the cable right away.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
::SIGH:: I almost hadded a TERRIBLE accident yesterday. I was upstairs wandering around and singing (or hollering if you believe my mother) and I decided to practice some circus stunts - hanging over the balcony and doing some tight rope walking on the balcony ledge, and all of a sudden I SLIPPED. Mommy hollered and I hung on for dear life and was able to pull myself back up onto the ledge by my claws before mommy could rescue me. She called me to come downstairs and I came running and she pickded me up and hugged me and told me I was too FAT to be doing that. Here I am traumatized and she calls me FAT. Well, she did apologize for the fat remark after a little while, so I gave her a face pat and a kissy.
Here is my Meezer Rule for today: always know your limitations and make sure you have sharpclaws.
Well fellow kitties, I hope you did your homewerk last week and took a tour of your houses wif an eye towards the whappables. Here is my absolute favorite whappable: The wireless DSL router. It's on a table right 'ahind the couch. My spot on the couch is directly over this table, and when mommy reclines in her seat, I am about 4 inches away from it. I can get down and lay on the table or just reach out and whap. oh and that flower thing is fun to whap too.
This is me in pre-whap posishun. I am eyeing my target and licking my lips in an-tis-a-pashun
Your assignment for this week is to practice the pre-whap posishun and the post whap stretch. It's important to get full extension and practice helps.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Monday, January 14, 2008
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Annie from Krasota Castle has been missing since Thursday. She is a mommy kitty and an indoor kitty and everyone there is very very worried about her. Please stop by Krasota Castle and send lots of purrrrrsss to bring her home too. She's a very sweet and beautiful girl and she needs to be home with her babies.
Friday, January 11, 2008
It's finally Friday!! YAY!! We do haf some pikshurs of pressies we gotted from Junior and Tyler, but we has to sit on mommy to get them off the camera. We is sorry it's taking so long to post them. ::SIGH:: ::ROLLS EYES AT MOMMY::
Our friends Tybalt and William were so kind to give us this award! Thank you Tybalt!! Thank you William!!!
Here are the rules:
1. You must write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think.
2. Acknowledge this post.
3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote.
4. Go tell your humans to fork over the treats!
Tesla who is a new blogger, and cute (and also needs some purrs right now)
Prince Muddy, Myst and Dandelion because they are all so cute and make mommy smile
Skittles because she makes us laff out loud (and had great yoga classes with a whole ham just for Miles after almost every class)
SophieKitty, a new friend
and Java, a new meezer friend
We also got this award from our wonderful friend Tara (and her brother Kavan)
Yao lin created this award for the sole purpose of recognizing those bloggers who are, quite literally, gems.
We would like to pass this on to
Patches, Mittens, Precious, Mistrie and Winter (who is new in the Big Piney Woods). - our bestest friends
Beau Beau and Angie who are both so cute
Bonnie and Victor who are very wonderful friends
and Egypt, Dino, Maxie, Tuxie and Midnight our wonderful friends in Colorado
Now mommy, get off your butt and get those pikshurs posted- our friends will start to think we are ungrateful Meezers! I will even try to NOT sleep on your face if it make any difference.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Thirteen naughty things I haf done this week
1. knocked over the side table by the couch. twice.
2. tripped mommy in the hall way (well she has HUGE feets, she needs to learn to control them)
3. threw up by the stairs
4. threw up in my dinner dish
5. threw up in front of my dinner dish
6. pooted in mommy's face while she was sleeping - and woke her up
7. changed the TV channel with my butt (if she would stop putting the 'amote on the couch where I sit this would not happen)
8. tried to pull the curtains by the slidy door down
9. ran my claws up and down the wall over mommy's head while she was sleeping. and woke her up
10. kicked mommy in the head while she was sleeping. and woke her up.
11. pushed Sammy off the back of the couch while he was sleeping.
12. kicked the coins all over the place when she was counting them. ( I think she stolded Sammy's windowsill money from the human litterbox room because the pile there used to be huge, and now it's mostly small brown metal round things)
13 bit mommy's nose.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
Me ferst! Today is Meezer Rule Wednesday. My rule for today is:
When someone has a big huge pile of coins that they is counting, make shur to stand in the middle of it and kick the coins around. This makes the beans say lots of werds on your bad werd list AND makes them forget how to count.
Oh, by the way mommy, sorry about kicking your coins around. hee hee. (not).
Welcome to the ferst Whapping Wednesday. This is the day that I, Sammy Meezer, king of the whap, will teach all of you my whapping tek-neek.
Todays ferst lesson is how to determine where the best opportunities for whapping are.
In my experience the best place for whapping is in the sleeping room. There are usually tables next to the bed, and on those tables are great whappable things, like cell phones, clocks, glasses that beans use to see and most importantly water glasses. Lots of beans put a cover on the water glass to keep us kitties from drinking out of them during the night, but they are not always whap proof. Also, if your beans think that water bottles are safe, they are sadly mistaken.
In the living room, if you has a fireplace and there is a shelf over it, that usually contains some great whappables. The kind that would make the beans heads explode if they saw you whapping them.
In the kit-chen, stuff on the counters is always good to whap- especially if it has grainy stuff inside - like salt or sugar - you know, stuff that requires the beans to get out mops and rug-sucking monsters.
The bathroom is also a wonderful source of whappables- especially if you has a lady bean who has lots of colored goo that she puts on her face. Or stuff on the sides of the tub.
Your assignment for this week is to walk through your house and make a note of where there are lots of whappables located and make a mental note of it.
Next week: What is whappable and what is not worth it.
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Guess what else? This is weird. Last night, Mommy gived us some ham babyfoods and Sammy akshually eated his. And I didn't eat mine. How weird is that? I don't know why I didn't eat mine. I eated pork chop for dinner after, so mommy didn't think I was sick. It smelled weird to me. I like the ham babyfood in ham cookies, but it was just weird in the bowl. I akshually think Sammy eated mine too. He has NEFUR eaten baby foods before and he doesn't eat people food, so mommy was surprised. She thinks that aliens came and switched us and madded us into pod-cats.
Monday, January 07, 2008
Friday, January 04, 2008
I can see the bottom of the crunchy bowl. I looked in the food cabinet and there is no crunchy bag, or even a box in there. Mommy said that I haf enough to last till tomorrow, but, when I get nervous I eat crunchies, and seeing the bottom of the cruncy bowl makes me nervous, so I will prolly eat them all by 3am and then I will start the boob-walk. and that will teach her that when daddy offers to go out to the convienence store and get more crunchies, she should say yes. and that it doesn't matter if he's wearing jammies and it's like minus eleventy four degrees outside. my crunchies are the most important thing.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Thirteen new ways of annoying Mommy:
1. playing jingle balls in the middle of the night
2. dragging fev-ver wands onto the bed in the middle of the night
3. making mommy sleep wif one arm straight out or over her head all night
4. storing stuff unner the love seat and then staring at it until she brings it out
5. putting it all back unner the love seat
6. throwing toys in and out of the tents
7. 38 laps around the living room from the big slidy window to the kitchen wif a big poofy tail, which makes her get up and turn on the outside light. which scares the aliens away so she can't see them.
8. begging for dinner and then letting Miles eat it all
9. digging in plastic bags
10. begging for tem-tay-shuns and then walking away. then coming back to beg again, then walking away, then coming back to beg again and finally eating them. REALLY S---L----O---W so that she has to hold Miles so he won't eat mine
11. laying on the couch behind mommy and licking my lips every 5 seconds - really loud
12. yakking up kibble - one piece at a time
13. pretending i want bean food and licking the piece she gives me and walking away. if i lick it Miles won't eat it either. hee hee.
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Wow, so much is going on! Ferst, IT'S OUR 2nd BLOGAVERSARY!!
We haf meeted so many wonderful wonderful kitties, beans, woofies, buns and any other species we forgotted to menshun. We can't believe it's been 2 years already!
So, with all this excitement going on, how does mommy celebrate? BY TRASHING OUR BLOG!!! Yes, that's right, stoopid mommy TRASHED our blog. We lost quite a few sidebar things like our Simply Siamese badge, and the ability to put pikshurs above our blog posts (mainly because she could not remember which 3 column blog she used before). I was SO angry that I kicked her. (Sammy's' note: He kicked her in the boob yesterday morning, a few hours BEFORE she trashed the blog. but not because of that, he did it because she was laying on his tail).
So, here's my Meezer Rule for today:
always back up your blog template. Or just don't let the humans mess with it.
Starting next week, we will be hafing a dual wednesday post. We will be hafing my normal Meezer Rule Wednesday and we will also haf the ferst weekly Whapping Wednesday lessons from Sammy. Some of them may even be video lessons!! (if mommy is fast enough to get him on video before he notices her).
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Happy New Year efurryone!!!
It's time for our New Year Resolutions!
1. I resolve to beg for tem-tay-shuns more
2. I resolve to eat as much ham as I can without exploding
3. I resolve to play thundering herd of elefants wif Sammy at least 3 times a day
4. I resolve to go camping more wif my girlfriendcat
5. I resolve to try efurry flavor of stinky goodness on the planet
1. I resolve to whap EFURRYFING in the house
2. I resolve to haf weekly whapping lessons for all of the cats in the catblogosphere
3. I resolve to snuggle more wif my sweetie girlfriend Abby
4. I resolve to lay on mommy's face in the middle of the night more often
5. I resolve to be a more finicky eater and keep mommy guessing as to what i will eat on any particular day
MILES I think that I'm getting close to home!! I just hope mine plane stops and lets me off - otherwise I'll overshoot the house a...